How to ask a cashier out : r/dating_advice - Reddit Theres no reason to be too embarrassed to ever return upon rejection unless youre either serenading the guy in a public show, or if you be otherwise dramatic or persistent about it. And youre right. To avoid this, try word-smithing your phrases carefully so that it does not sound too formal or robotic. and our https://yesmeansyesblog.wordpress.com/2011/03/21/mythcommunication-its-not-that-they-dont-understand-they-just-dont-like-the-answer/. And this is an obvious double standard but I think its less of a big deal because the manager in question is male. "I don't know and I don't care" or if she answers something like: "I love those cookies, I wish someone would invite me to eat them.". It was my first job ever, I worked part time for a store that primarily sold video games and video game accessories. This powerful weapon can be obtained through several means, and, To read the offense in Madden 21, look for the playmaker markers, pre-snap reads, and read/react opportunities. You can deduce from both verbal and nonverbal cues what her feelings towards you are, whether she's friendly because of her professionalism or because she actually wants to be your friend. I came here to drink milk and kick ass. Make an effort to get to know your crush in a non-work context before asking him out. Its awesome. It will only make your I know people who have met because they ride the same train to work every day or theyve attended the same sporting event. Every week, she would buy a bunch of corn and talk to him. Make me a good burrito, and you will always have a platonic place in my heart. was a customer that I wanted to hit on me! I think people sometimes forget that retail employees are supposed to act like this, but then, a lot of people assume that if a woman is smiling at you, shes obviously interested in you, so. I actually thought the OP might be a man. If theyre interested they will, specifically, ask you. That, of course, is why lots of managers would rather customers notask out their employees its a good way to lose customers who then feel too awkward to return. in advance, prepare a little note and state to her what you have stated to us. Or, just be a little more obvious about YOUR flirting; hang there beside him just to talk to him, and then watch is body language; is he glad of it, or does he start to get antsy or pull away after a polite interval. There is also the fact that their job hinges on them being nice to everyone- also a power issue. If he says, Oh, I have to get home, maybe hes not so interested. Reply Like #9 Never asked a cashier out , but i allways wanted to ask a female car sales women , how much for a hummer , so far i haven't had the chance..Lew Reply Like We looked into each others' eyes for about two weeks. Id love a womans advice on how to go about this, because I want to do it the right way for both parties involved. If she's completely unresponsive stop immediately. But ultimately, I cant change who I am nor should I. This will make things even more uncomfortable/annoying for the employee and might even cause her to face a reprimand at work if her employer doesn't fully understand what happened. You should try it sometime. so if said gentleman wishes to run into you outside of work he would have a pretty good idea of how to do so. Youre just engaging through a different means of communication rather than face to face. There joined a new cashier in my local food product market. My Question is how can I ask for her number, or ask her out for a coffe while she is on The amount was wrong. Try to keep your same happy attitude towards her whatever the result. I dont think its fair to ask people to voluntarily take on that risk at work when theres another approach that will neatly avoid that issue. The next time the store is slow and he rings you up when youre the only person in line have that piece of paper ready. This is coming from a womans perspective, so take it with a grain of salt. And then you never, ever speak of it again. I realized Im just one data point, but I am actually friends with many people who Ive met through work. With the acknowledgment that some people may say NOT to ask a cashier out at her work, can I get some ideas from you all assuming that I AM going to ask her out. How do you tell an answerer that you think their answer needs work? Youre visualizing a very specific scenario, where youre being asked out in a very nonthreatening way, presumably by having a woman express interest in you, which doesnt happen so much in a culture that discourages women from doing this. Because of that, it can be easy to I dont think its a horrendous crime to ask someone out, I just remember wishing (as a former waitress) that people would just let me bring them their food instead of assuming were friends now because weve been interacting for 8 minutes in my place of work. Get their attention by saying something like I was wondering if youd like to grab dinner sometime rather than Will you go out with me? If youre going to do this, the leaving your number AND THEN LEAVING, with the expectation of not returning to that business, is the least awful approach. So whats the best way to ask ehr out or get her number while shes working? My dear Internet god, those posters on Craigslist are pathetic. When I was newly single (and loving it) after an early, long marriage, I ended up chatting regularly with a nice and nice-looking young man who worked in the produce department of my usual grocery store. But at least you put the ball in her court but have not placed any demands. If the OP says smalltalk isn't a thing, I believe him, and it's another sign that flirting won't go over well. This looks for me like a long comment and not like an answer. Theres also the fact that we dont know the OPs gender, and we dont know if this is opposite sex flirtation. and after a few encounters we started really talking if there was no other customers around. Any approach must provide an easy exit for her so there'll be no uncomfortable conversations next time. If you buy e.g. When youre in a position where your continued success (and as a waitress, your actual ability to pay your eat/bills) is contingent on playing nice with people who treat you like crap day in and day outand looking sufficiently enthusiastic about it, thankyouverymuchthe power dynamic there is way off. I didnt know there was a section in Craigslist like that. So I met this girl about two weeks ago. Thanks very much for your thoughtful comment. There's a strong bias against guys bothering random girls in shops with requests for dates (speaking from experience). Certainly, it can be that way, but to me, Id take being asked out as a form of flattery, even if I wasnt interested. Is there any acceptable way to ask retail staff for a date? Citation please Im genuinely interested in this, Studies have actually found that men are just as capable as women at understanding nonverbal communication/soft nos. If you like cheese fries maybe you should stop by, Oh, I didnt even think about the maybe you should stop by, and thats great. I got hit on by so many men when I was 16ish that could have been my father. And Says shes tired? I was 19 and very naive when a customer a few years older asked me out. Anyway, Ive taken to wearing a gold band on my ring finger to discourage that behavior, but men dont seem to notice. Keep a close eye on who listens intently to what youre saying, and who just wants to hear themselves talk. And I just want to get my paycheck and go home. And if he doesnt call you actually have to forget the incident ever happened, for real no joke you actually have to. You could try to get friendly with one of his coworkers to find out if hes single, and possibly also when his break is or when he gets off work. I suspect answers can be highly different depending on the cultural context. Don't make it awkward. So sorry to say, for me at least, the perceived romantic connections were not real. She seemed interested, so I just asked "Are you new here? then nope. He was never angry or aggressive when we were together, just smothering and overstepping his boundaries. What the worst that could happen from politely and not creepily seeing what happens next from this real world connection? My rule is simple. And if she did come back at a later time and ask you for coffee, it would be a very great surprise. Because of that, it can be easy to mistakenly misinterpret them doing their job (being nice to you) as social/romantic interest. I also made sure none of his co-workers or any customers were nearby. JovanHuttonPulitzer #SaveAmericaFromSocialism on Twitter: ask Enjoy your time together but make sure that you maintain boundaries; this will help create an enjoyable experience for both parties involved! As it happens, safe is the first one. Having people try to flirt or ask me out when I was behind a cash register was the worst. She thought they got along OK and that he seemed interested, but he never asked her out. Cookie Notice Is part of the joke that theyre attempting to steal the line from John Carpenters movie _They Live_? So everything is possible but it has a lot to do with the interpersonal chemistry. The last time I was in, I said it was weird we didnt know each others names by now, so I told her mine and got hers and the other cashiers she was talking to. If she's interested, she'll follow it unless unable. Working retail, this happens so, so frequently that it stops being flattering and becomes another work annoyance that you have to deal with, plus the unease of not knowing how someone is going to react if you reject them. We've just spoken briefly a few times i doubt she remember who i am, "i have won million dollars lottery in cash and i can't count them! Canadian of Polish descent travel to Poland with Canadian passport. You can round file it if you like but Ill do as I please. It would probably be best to not think about it any longer. Shed been going to the coffee shop for several months, and he was really friendly every time they talked, complimenting her on safe topics like her manicure, etc. Then, awkwardness. Having worked retail as a female, being asked out is one of the most annoying things that can happen to a person, it can go as far as making her feel unsafe. Its great to know that youd be flattered (even if not interested)! the flipside of male privilege men get to generally live their lives without an underlying fear of being rapedbut once in a while that fear comes in real handy. When I worked retail, I got hit on a few times by male customers. Please dont hit on retail employees. This is impolite and quite creepy. One time when he wasnt there I said to his coworker, Hey, is the cute guy working today? She told him I had asked about him, and the next time I went in he gave me his number. I once asked a girl to explain what she meant, when what she actually wanted to say would have been perfectly clear if we had been in a bar. Scoring a volley in FIFA 22 is an art form that requires skill and finesse. The cashier will not be creeped out by this approach and can indicate her receptiveness in how she responds to this no-pressure overture. Don't think a girl is attracted to you because she's doing her job. We and our partners use data for Personalised ads and content, ad and content measurement, audience insights and product development. >:(. And then poof you have a friend, and can still visit the business. OMG yes. Make sure you aren't unconsciously seeking self-validation of some kind. Youd be surprised by how many people do misinterpret friendliness for genuine interest. I too worked retail and was both hit on and asked out. Nothing terribly overt but just talking, asking what I'm up to for the rest of the day and just seeming kind of excited to talk to me. Oh sorry, I'm a little distracted, I'm trying to get in the zone. She has an easy escape: "Back to work, bye". Don't ask someone out while they are at work. To be successful in this In your case, if she declines, you must never mention it again and pretend like it never happened. Women should never go to an unfamiliar mans private address. She's working, and since she's working as a cashier, her job description doesn't involve being picked up by random guys. Be casual, play it cool and do not put pressure on it, and Im saying this because I think youll go through with it. If I didnt know them outside of the customer-employee interaction, theres no way in hell Id go to a private address. If she is interested in you and has time, she will probably arrange to come to the event some time and you will see her there. You can try going to the supermarket at different times, e.g. You could also do a step in between. How to Ask Out a Cashier - Vino La Vino You can only do this is you wont be crushed by rejection and you wont be weird the next time you go to the store. An awkward situation she is placed in repeatedly by men, through no doing of her own and with no way to prevent it, due to their sex drives. You can guess empowered is too, but there's a third: ability. Im not interested. I was on both sides of this in my misspent youth. Tip number 2 for getting cashier girls: To seduce a cashier girl, be very well dressed and be well groomed. Dudes dont have to be horny to ask a girl out brodette. Or she might clue you in on to where she might be outside of work. or "Did you enjoy it" or even worse, "Where were you?". Again, only partake this if it genuinely is by chance. Can I use the spell Immovable Object to create a castle which floats above the clouds? Martial arts class. My main concern was that I didnt want to put this person in an uncomfortable position or jeopardize his job, and what youve recommended sounds like it would work so thanks very much for the advice :), Oops, that was supposed to be a response to and we danced from the ocean. If I thought I was going to get tipped regardless (i.e., they were with a group and split checks, etc.) My female friend just started dating a waiter we met while out to eat. Hitting on people who depend on you for tips is low. He is the only person who ever scored my real phone number, and I wasnt a bit sorry. I had to over-analyze every word that came out of my mouth so as not to sound too friendly or encouraging. I was happy someone mentioned that. By accepting all cookies, you agree to our use of cookies to deliver and maintain our services and site, improve the quality of Reddit, personalize Reddit content and advertising, and measure the effectiveness of advertising. Asking her out directly seems like a bad idea. Instead, in these situations, I've found something that works much better for both of you. During yo The girl in the booth at the post office will also talk to you. She either says yes or no, and if no you honorably and politely take the rejection. Book club. Practice in front of a mirror or with friends, so that you are comfortable speaking and expressing yourself before you actually approach the cashier. But I did once have someone hit on me, and to me the difference is generally pretty clear. As a guy, I dont worry about the woman attacking me or anything but I do think about getting robbed by someone else hiding at her place. The majority of guys were creepy and it was a huge irritant, especially if they were repeat offenders. She will expect you, on next visit, to quiz her about "did you come?" Ive seen you in here a lot and you seem like the type of person I would like to get to know in real life. AH this reminds me of when I went out to brunch with a friend and she picked the restaurant and as we were walking up to the door she turned to me and said, Well, I cant promise I wont ask out our waiter before the end of the meal! It turns out she was a regular at this place and had a huge thing for a waiter. Theres a lot of baggage (no pun intended) with singling out Women For Special Protection. is it unprofessional to have hickeys at work? If the cashier is interested in going out, its best to take things slow and get to know each other better before making any big decisions. They get stared at & aggressively flirted with on a regular basis. It is not out of the realm of possibility that someone might make a complaint, factual or otherwise, about a retail worker who turned him/her down.

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