M.I.A. was right – bad girls do it right. By “it” I mean everything. They also say that good girls seldom make history. That is also true. Betty Goody-Two-Shoes is not remembered by the masses long after she’s dead but Madame Du Barry is. You see there is absolutely nothing memorable about the girl who lives life by the book, follows the rules society has set for her. She’s the type of girl who never skipped school, never smoked behind the bleachers. She’s the one that lost her virginity on prom night in missionary position like a good girl that she promised her daddy she would always be. She got into a “safe” school, majored in something “safe” and boring like let’s say – elementary school education. At the exactly right time she met the “right” man who’s an equally good boy with a steady, safe job – perhaps an accountant or a fellow teacher! They dated for precisely a year (sex is still in the missionary position but perhaps now she and her boyfriend are adventurous enough to leave the lights on! Gasp!), then he proposed with a modest solitaire ring. They bought a starter house, got married in the boring ceremony at the local country club with their families looking on, got pregnant within a year, she left her “career”, they had another 2 kids in quick succession. She never made a noise, never peeked her face out of the hive, she chose comfort over style. Soon she’s exhausted all the time because she’s Captain Mommy who’s looking after 3 kids and a dog. She’s clipping coupons because a family of 5 is tough to carry on an accountant’s salary. The twice a week sex slips through the cracks, kids go away to college, the above mentioned accountant starts fucking Laura from accounting because she lets him do it doggy style. Eventually the good girl wakes up one morning and realizes that she wasted her entire life following the rules.
Meanwhile the bad girl, the one we all remember from school – the one who ditched, smoked, got sent to the principal on more than one occasion but still somehow manipulated him into loving her; she’s thriving. Because you see she chose to take a year off from school and travel, she picked the least “safe” profession imaginable. Let’s say she studied to be a fashion designer! She dated an endless parade of wealthy, successful, exciting men. She moved to the big city. She married that one dangerous, sexy, older man with a demanding career the one that she surprises at the office after hours and fucks him silly on his CEO desk. Sometimes she drops in for lunchtime quickly. Sometimes they don’t go into the office at all because they can’t tear themselves away from each other and enjoy naked Tuesdays where they spend the day naked doing nothing but fucking and ordering take out. They color with every crayon in their boxes. They decide against having children because she would rather die than ruin her figure and he lives to make her happy. They travel and live a life of leisure and privilege filled with fun and excitement. Eventually they feel that they could use someone else to lavish their love on so they adopt a pretty little newborn girl who joins them. They did things on their own terms, got married when it suited them. Had or didn’t have children when they truly wanted to. They lived their lives for no one but themselves. Meanwhile society yells and points fingers that she’s a terrible person, a terrible wife because she never cooks or does the laundry, she’s a terrible mother because she’s selfish, because she gives her child the best things in life. She’s bad because she was ruthless and stepped on people on her way up and now she’s the most prominent designer in the world and a million girls would kill to have her career. She’s bad because she did a threesome, slept around, tried everything and more.
But you know what? I’d rather be a bad girl than a good one. Because bad girls never blow their brains out because of unhappiness, they never settle and they never give into the pressures of society. And that’s something that everyone can admire.
Story by Andrea Guitierrez.